I’ve had three days off, and despite enjoying being with my baby immensely, I’ve been feeling kind of isolated in mommy-world. I tried to find a mommy meet-up in my nearest city… there are none. Seriously, none. There are some in the city where I work, but that is an hour drive each way. I contacted the ladies who are local SMC-ers, but all of them live at least an hour or more away. I literally went to a popular park with the baby and sat on a bench with her, just to be around other moms and babies. They were all either in groups already, or had much older kids playing on the playground equipment, but still.

I am constantly harassing my sister and other close friends, or other family members with babies, to try to plan meet-ups, even though it means several hours in a car for Jo Jo and I. No one else ever initiates these things with us, so am I just extra needy? Or is everyone else I know (mom or otherwise) just all set in the social department?

Author: Mother of All Things

Mother by fostering, adoption, and marriage... wife to my best friend... Bay area critical care nurse... travel in my blood, reading in my bones, clean food on my mind!

7 thoughts on “isolated”

  1. Do to my middle of nowhereness I have to go elsewhere for playdates as well. I (with my last breath of let me speak to another human being before I die) reconnected with friends from high school that lived in my area and had a kid around the same age as mine on facebook. I had no social department before this.

    This was very very important to my sanity. And G’s. You are not alone with your feelings.

  2. Do you want to email me and see how far apart we are? I think we are less than two hours. And I have another blog friend in Royal Oak. I’d be totally willing to have a play date if there’s a good middle place! I have a group of crunchy mom friends by me but no other SMCs and generally feel pretty isolated.

  3. For the first 2 years I was completely isolated with my daughter. I started to suspect that she was delayed developmentally, at least in speech and social skills. I had her assessed through E.I. and she was speech delayed a whole year. I NEEDED to get her around kids. We lived in a gang-guns-shootings area and there was no safe community to become a part of. I found a nanny share on Craigslist and started taking her 15 hours/week just so she could play with another little girl her age. I was ready to put her in daycare just for the socializing. Eventually, we drained our savings, searched around, and moved to a neighborhood of young families. It was the best thing that has every happened to her. She has blossomed socially, her vocabulary is off the charts, she is fearless and a leader among the kids. In just a few months.

    Being isolated was bad for me, as a mother with no support, but even worse for my daughter, who was a born social butterfly and I didn’t even know it. I basically upheaved my whole life to give her neighborhood friends. I know you are in a beautiful place on a lake, so maybe that’s not a realistic solution for you. But if Jojo finds permanency in your home, it might be a sacrifice worth making. Either a move near other children or… a sibling??

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