I posted a pic of “Hermanito”, M’s baby-brother-on-the-way, that Cindy sent to me a few days ago. I often find myself wondering where he will end up, who his forever family will be. He is due in July, and his father is native Mexican just like M’s, so I know they will look alike. I find myself thinking that there would be no more perfect sibling situation for M than a biological sibling who is adopted and is her “real” brother in every way… both biologically and being raised together. To give her that link between both of her worlds would be really be the biggest and best thing I could ever do for her.
So when the baby is due, either he’ll be born on the other side of the country where Cindy is now, or she’ll come home to deliver (as she did with M). If he’s born in that state and/or removed from her in that state, I will try to get contact info but will not pursue placement (unless a case worker directly asks me and the current foster family has not had him a long time).
If the baby is born in my state and removed, I hope I will find out right away so that I can make calls and try for kinship placement. I would have to be emergently licensed and the licenser at my agency said I couldn’t be. But I think that she’s wrong. I would go directly through DHS if this was the case. I don’t think my agency wants me to have two kids because my house is so small. When the state came for my inspection, however, they said it was not if I used the (enclosed, heated) porch as a room (it’s M’s play room and my mom’s office right now), and it was ok to use for that. Also, I’m pretty sure you can have an infant up to age 2 in your own room, in a crib or bassinet. So I wouldn’t even need to use the porch for the baby until he was two.
So I think it’s extremely unlikely that M’s bio mom will come back to have the baby, but hey, she did for M. The chances of this all happening is slim, but if it does? Maybe it was meant to be. At least for a short time? Since bio dad is known, he may come into play at some point. But in the meantime? Yeah, this is M’s brother. If he’s in my state and in care, he should be with us!
And yeah, having an infant while in school will totally suck. The timing is not great. I can’t afford two in daycare, so only M would go to daycare. But you know what? Babies are easy. My mom is awesome, she loves little babies, she’ll keep him at home. It’s the toddler who is the difficult one!!!
Mother of All Things 