We went in one more time today to finish M’s school registration and also show my mom where her classroom is. At first, she was kind of ok, and posed for some pics with the photographer who is documenting the school’s grand opening. (Our area is very rural so Montessori anything is an event that the newspapers are covering.) The photographer then got some shots of her interacting with her new teacher. After that, my friends, it went severely downhill. M started throwing things, hitting, stomping on the materials, and running around like a fire was lit under, with her shoes off no less. The teacher was gracious and patient, but I was mortified.
The behavior continued the rest of the day. I guess it’s a bad day for her (and me) but I’m worried that her teacher will now see her as a potential problem child. I worry that being 2 1/2 alone will mean that it’s more challenging for her in the class. I really don’t want to set her up for failure.
Luckily, teachers and administrators tell me again and again that they are fully confident that she’ll learn, that her teacher is the best, and that she’s so busy and active because she’s smart. I just hope they still think so by October, and that I don’t end up with no childcare at all and a kid who was expelled from preschool.
I know that all toddlers have horrendous bad days and experienced teachers know this. Many of the staff have seen her three times before when she was exceptionally well behaved, so that at least was not their only impression of her. I also know that the pressure she was under to sit for photos and do specific things with the teacher might’ve been too much, in a new environment, and with the intuition that she will be going through a big change soon. My gut says she might have some rocky days, but after a few months she will surprise everyone with her growth just as she did last year in school.
But I’m scared… I’m really, really scared.
Mother of All Things 
I was going to say – I think maybe she sensed this was something really big & important, and didn’t know how to process those emotions, so she lashed out. Did you talk to her about it after?
Like you said, every kid has bad days. Especially when a big transition is taking place. She’ll find her groove and learn to love the routine. She may thrive on it, who knows!
I can imagine your mortification, and I’m sure those people who watched it all happen felt for you!
I agree it was probably the pressure of it. She will do great and they won’t expell her. They just don’t do that. Talk and talk about the school and the change. Be matter of fact and don’t try to sell her on it.
I am starting my twelfth year as a Montessori Primary Classroom teacher….and believe me I have seen it all!!! Tears, major tantrums, and of course lots of smiles. Do not worry at all about your teacher forming opinions based on those first impressions. One of my “favorite” children of all time (who is a fantastic middle schooler now) started his first day by physically attacking me and breaking my necklace, and I wept when he graduated three years later. Montessorians love a challenge and we all believe the work can settle the child in the environment.
She will have a fantastic experience over the years in this classroom! My only advice is to keep drop off quick and simple….”You are going to have a great day. I’ll see you soon. Love you. Bye!” Often too much talk and discussion will lead to major anxiety. Congrats on picking what sounds like a wonderful school.
Thanks! This helps a lot!